Ive’ been wanting to tell you, Laurel made me one such lonely girl. Forgive me for this but the entire story, she made me feeling down. When you died, you see, she kept it all to herself. Let it be known to the dead, whom no longer be able to answer her letters back or impart some words of wisdom to sooth her confused mind, the burden was all passed to me. Since I am still a part of the living world, I have to carry all her angst, her loneliness, her grief in this world. To her family, to his friends, to her first love, whom she cannot be open to and share her feelings. I saw it in her eyes how she relive you and more of your precious moments together. The happy ones and the sad ones as well. As i hear her think of all the times that led you to that fateful night, each revelation was like one step to the burning fire. I got scared every time she was peeling off layers and layers of truths around you and your death. I was so anxious to know. In the same way, I want to know you more personally. But it will never happen now. The faeries and the wings, by the way, was such a hit. Even i would believe it if I was your sister, too.
I don’t like it when Laurel wrote about your relationship with Paul and Billy. Sounded like real trouble to me! I would have gladly let her share it with Sky, I know he can be trusted. But it was between me and Laurel alone. All of it. That we had to tackle all her doubts and fears, joys and pain, the forgiving and forgetting part. When she entered highschool, with you being gone, broken family, Mom moving out, ping-pong stay with Dad and Jesus-fearing Aunt Amy, no friends, a past trying to get away from, fitting in, then finally having friends for real, liking somebody, loving Sky and Sky loving her back. And dumping her soon enough, for lame excuses that don’t matter. Or they really do matter! It was not that an easy life to handle for her, you know. After all, she was just a teenager. And you were no longer to guide her through this. Don’t get me wrong, May. I know you don’t want any of this. You don’t have any choice. It just happened.
Actually, the writing to the dead part doesn’t bother me. It was why Laurel was doing that made me wonder how bad you and your little sister had to endure those last few moments you were together. What happened to you was sad, even tragic. Like what happened to all those people she had written letters to. Kurt Cobain, Amelia Earhart, Amy Winehouse, Jim Morrison, and the list goes on. Their death put everybody including the people they don’t know in grief and misery. But in taking a glimpse of their lives when still living, shed a light on how normal people they can be. It even made me understand how from their background, life took them to different paths.
Laurel really took your passing away so hard that it was sucking away the happiness in her life. Sky, who at some point, almost gave up on her. But when i came to know the truth, the reason behind all those feelings, I now understood. What happened to her, also, was sad and depressing. But lets be thankful to those who helped her get back on her feet again. Special mention to friends, Hannah and Natalie, Tristan and Kristen, Mom and Dad, Aunt Amy and Mrs. Buster. They were not perfect but their imperfections made Laurel accept and understand the world more. I wish you could have met them all, when you were still here. You will like them, for sure!
Life has to move on, even when you are no longer around. You will not be forgotten, May. But accepting and letting you go, in some way helped clear Laurel’s path to enjoying each and everyday of her life.
She really looked up to you May. She loved you more than anything. You were such an amazing sister, an inspiration even though you were as flawed as you can be.
She loved you then, she still loves you now. Laurel misses you so badly. But until you meet again, you will be her one and only star, or fairy with the most beautiful and strong wings, for that matter.
It begins as an assignment for English class: Write a letter to a dead person. Laurel chooses Kurt Cobain because her sister, May, loved him. And he died young, just like May did. Soon, Laurel has a notebook full of letters to people like Janis Joplin, Amy Winehouse, Amelia Earhart, Heath Ledger, and more; though she never gives a single one of them to her teacher. She writes about starting high school, navigating new friendships, falling in love for the first time, learning to live with her splintering family. And, finally, about the abuse she suffered while May was supposed to be looking out for her. Only then, once Laurel has written down the truth about what happened to herself, can she truly begin to accept what happened to May. And only when Laurel has begun to see her sister as the person she was; lovely and amazing and deeply flawed; can she begin to discover her own path.
MY TAKE ON THE BOOK:
Sad and happy at the same time. I guess, this is the kind of reaction Ms. Ava Dellaira is hoping to get from anybody who reads her story. Yes, this book might deceive you passing as a young adult novel. But be aware that though it involved teenagers, it is as depressing a bad life in real world anybody can get. Yes, it made me feel down, almost all the time but it was only an indication on how effective her writing was. At the end, it all boils down to whether you relate yourself with the story or you learn something from it. Books like these, tackling the relationship between sisters, will always have a place in my reader-heart. I have my one and only sister, and these kind of books made me really appreciate her more. Treasuring each and every second with her, fightings and making fun with and about us, included. I will be more than happy to take the bad with the good, as long as as we experience life together and grow old together.
I learned a lot, too. From biographical points to wisdoms in life. These celebrities’ pasts can be quite informative and helpful, though sometimes, it felt to much for me. Information-overload as you may have it, from some of those unnecessary letters that can be omitted and still come up with a good book that conveys those messages you want the reader to know and learn from. But if everything is to be regarded, this book is as effective and touching that it encouraged me to do like what Laurel did. A letter to May.
After all, MAY is one of the more famous names now. Love Letters to the Dead is one good book in the literary world nowadays, that makes her one dead celebrity, right?!. 🙂
“♥ ♥ ♥ ♥”