Daily Archives: June 30, 2014

41. WHERE SHE WENT by Gayle Forman (If I Stay #2)


They say, it’s lonely at the top.
I say, not with you by my side.
We can pluck out the moon and the stars,
Together, as we kiss in the shining moonlight.

But funny, life, oh so it seems,
That when i finally reached my dream.
I stretch out my hand for you to hold,
I gasped, no longer there, just air, biting cold!

Where he went, i keep on repeating.
Where he went, my heart wants to stop beating.
Where he went, as i close my eyes,
Where he went, oh where is my goodbye?

They say, it’s so lonely at the top.
I believe, because i’m just at that.
What use am i being here,
Just take me, and let’s dive in that cold empty sphere.

Where HE went-track 1
OBLIVION (my album-to-be)
Or better yet DELUSION

Nope. Adam is not here. I made that up, since in real life, i am my own Adam Wilde. Minus the fame and the meds and the rockstar image, i really can relate. This book got into me, Big time! Three years and still wondering what happened, what went wrong. That is so cruel. This is my own version of where she went. But unlike Adam, he got his answers at the very end, at least. Me, still up in the air. I just really don’t want to care. Enough!

The Book

Yes, if you read If I Stay, by the same author, you can pick up from where the story left off. If not, i strongly advise to get it right before you turn that pages over. Read so you can get the full history. Bits and pieces will not do any good, though this time, Adam’s narrating his POV, not Mia.

Yes, Mia stayed. Despite all those tragedies in her prime, she battled it out, and she chose to stay. But where she went after? New York was the literal response since becoming a professional cellist is her biggest dream and Juilliard School is in New York. Off she went, took a plane never looked back. And Adam, Adam do not know where to pick up all the pieces. No signs, no clues, no breadcrumbs, no Mia. Mia really stands for her name, Missing In Action.

I remember Adam being Mia’s loyal boyfriend. When she was still fighting for her life in that hospital bed in Oregon, he was her lifeline. He loves her and would do anything, everything, just to make her stay. And stay, she did. But after few months of recovery, she had a change of heart. Why? I cannot tell you why. But i am telling you this, Adam felt so devastated. His world shattered, his heart smashed into pieces. But what was surprising was Mia who caused this broken heart of his was the one who revived not his heart, but his musical dreams. Full of not so happy emotions, he focused on the anger and depression through making lyrics. Then, together with his band, they spiraled into the world of rock and roll. Instant stardom, money and fame. He had it all, even women. He really live up to his name Adam “the Wildman” Wilde.

Despite all the world can offer, he still felt empty and we know why. MIA. Mia whose performing that same night in New York, his last before he traveled to London. I knew it, Adam cant resist the opportunity to see her even from a distance, so he went.

Meeting her was not at an option, much more talking and spending the night with her. But that night sealed the deal. That night was the night of explaining, understanding and closure. That night, Adam got his answers. And that night, he was the one to choose to stay or let go.

For the sake of Adam, i tried not hating Mia so much. I tried to understand. At one point, i failed.

A heart-wrenching tale at that, i am assuring you. I cried! Buckets and buckets for pain, confusion, memories, disappointments, regrets, tearful and happy ones too. What made it worse, i listened to Adam. His voice or that voice over the audiobook was truly a heartbreaker. I sympathized with him, i suffered. But most of all, i fell in love. Got that? Deeply. I fell in love with a rockstar! 🙂

Waiting for your one true love, even if it hurts, rarely happens these days. And Adam did that for Mia. I cant fathom how big is his love. But i wish, oh i really wish there are more of you, Adam Wilde, in the world i live in. I would love to be loved by you! ❤ ❤ ❤

— “But i’d do it again. I know that now. I’d make that promise a thousand times over and lose her a thousand times over to have heard her play last night or to see her in the morning sunlight. Or even without that. Just to know that she’s somewhere out there. Alive.— Adam”

— “Hate me. Devastate me. Annihilate me. Re-create me. Re-create me. Won’t you, re-create me.” —

— “Her hands are freezing, just like they always were, so i warmed them, just like i always did. – Adam” —

— “You don’t share me. You own me. -Adam” —

— “You made me stay!- Mia” —

This one goes straight to my favorites! No question, no doubt!


Categories: book review, books, favorite lines, quotes | Tags: , , , , , | 2 Comments

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