NEW YEAR’s resolution… TO WRITE OR NOT TO WRITE… here we go again!


It has been 21 days. The first month of the year is almost over. I wanted to write as soon as the year clocked in but got busy with family, friends, work, love. Kidding!  As expected, my first new year’s resolution, which is to WRITE as soon as,  was an “epic 21 days later fail”. Because doing nothing was hard. And while i was pondering why am i not following my heart’s desire to write again, just toying with lazy days and finding excuses, somebody grabbed and knocked some sense out of me. Not in a threatening way, not physically, nor even bribery (honestly, i hoped it was! 🤑), but just words. Her words done in repetition, had put me strongly in this position. I sat down, opened my laptop, stared at it, stood up, brewed some coffee, checked my phone, checked the time, sipped the now ice cold black coffee, read a chapter in my current bedside book, checked the phone some more, and then finally, came back in front of my lappy, started typing words away.

What should i write? Okay, just let me backtrack for a minute. I used to write, five years ago. I had a blog, STORY OF MY LIFE. Cliche, but that was the truth. The story of my so-called-life. Then. That blog were mostly book reviews, since i was a big reader. Most of them were just my humble opinion. Purely my feelings about a certain book, loved it, hated it but never thrashed or abandoned. I wrote with all of my heart’s content, not minding if somebody will read or care for them. It all changed when i was asked by a budding author to review her first book. Can you imagine my joy? All i want was just to write and express myself and suddenly, somebody wants to hear my opinion. An honest review was all she needed and that gave way for me to write some more serious notes. Stepped up my game in writing, maybe i had potentials, too. Or so i thought at that moment.

Second push was when i was featured in one of my co-bloggers account. He asked me to write about a book called “Why We Broke Up” by Daniel Handler. When i scanned my reviews, i realized it was never featured in my own blog. Coming days, i will put it up. It was one of my “feel proud” moments. Was I that lucky or what?!

Beside book reviews, i tried my hand in travel writing. Accounts of my personal trips, narrated in a way of sharing my experiences, pictures and ideas. Little did i know, i was able to help some people in their actual traveling too. What a joy to know somebody’s paying attention!

I also worked on poems and short stories. Mostly were my personal experiences. People that I know of, places that i’ve seen, feelings that i’ve been through. The more emotional i got, the more feelings came to life. Sometimes happy, sometimes sad but at the end, it was fun writing them all.

But as you know it, life is not always rainbow and sunshine. While i was being successful in other areas of my life, my heart was shattered into pieces. I was dumped by the only man i truly opened and gave my heart to. I took the blow hard, was knocked out for a very very long time. My life, my choice. My reading suffered, my writing dwindled. Until the day it stopped all together. Hence again, five years ago. Story Of My Life was buried under the virtual ground.

My love for books has recovered, but my writing stayed in the slump. I never attempted even once. Even though my heart was already healed long time ago, i remained passive when writing is concerned. Until late last year.


The last two weeks of 2018 were the most challenging for me. We had some unforeseen events regarding our family travel. It was one-year-in-the-making type of plan and 2 days before the schedule, something came up. Something that needed a quick but right decision. I had to do an all-nighter to make it all work. In the end, i pulled it through. Everything went smoothly. That was when my sister kept on suggesting i should write again. May i quote it from her own words, “You owe it to the netizens.” A funny remark but something tugged at my heart. I shrugged the idea because it was too funny. I questioned her how exactly did i owe it to them? Days passed, still that tug. I felt haunted but excited and scared as well. Still questioning myself but slowly answering to the call… Can i write again? Can i really write again, if not better, at least in the way that i used to? Will somebody care to read? I am just a nobody. If so, will it be useful, readable and interesting for them? So many questions it took me days and night, thinking.

Shoulda. Woulda. Coulda.
Will i know the answer if I won’t try? Of course not!

I guess, i finally made up my mind since i am here now. A revival, redemption, a beginning. An upgrade if i may call it. Better version of me. I had to choose whether i will create a new blog or just stick to this one. I chose the latter. I am bringing back this blog to life, so as my life will bring back many things to this blog. I may have done a few changes but this is still me. Only, this is not just about the story of my life. This will be about the dreams i turned into reality, the ones i will be turning into as i go through this journey. Imperfect as this may seem, I hope and pray that i can encourage and inspire more people. I wish to see you around chasing dreams as i do. After all, i am the Dream Chaser. Let us all be. 🙂






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TEASER TUESDAYs (July 15, 2014)

Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme, hosted by MizB of Should Be Reading. Anyone can play along! Just do the following:

• Grab your current read
• Open to a random page
• Share two (2) “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page
• BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away! You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)
• Share the title & author, too, so that other TT participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teasers.


this is mine,


“… but most of all, i was trying not to think about the fact that we had been told, by experts who knew these things, that he had approximately three months left to live.” 


second chance summer


what’s yours??? 🙂

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Knock. Knock. : An Attempt to Short Story Making


I heard them, though, it was quite just like a tap. I look at the clock hanging in the wall.  2 in the morning.


There they go again.  But this time, a bit louder.  I look at the door, this time.

I am not expecting anybody.  More over, at this hour?   Every living being is supposed to be sleeping at  this time.

My neighbors are sleeping.  I should be sleeping.  I wonder who is at the other side of this wooden door.  


I waited for another minute.  Maybe, a dream?   So, i go back to lying in my bed.  As my head hit the pillow,  another set of knocks.  More rapid, more eager.  


This time i answered, “Who is it?”  

I stood up and head for the door.

“It’s me.'”  I heard it clear, though he just said it  like a whisper.  I can’t believe.  I don’t want to believe.  I know that voice very well.  But it can’t be coming from him.  It has been two years.  Two long years.

“It’s me”, he repeated.  My mind is spinning as i open the door slowly.  I never expected this thing would happen. Not in this lifetime, anyway.  Much things had happened.

But there he is.  Two eyes looking at me intently.  As he uttered the words, “I told you I’ll come back. Im here now.”

I looked back at him, mixed emotions starting to build up inside me.  Anger, relief, broken, happy.  But most of all, sad.  I cannot believe how can he say that casually after two long years of disappearing.  Two long years of my misery.

But i won’t let him know it.  I will stand my ground, so I look right through his deep brown eyes.  It stared back at me, searching.  


As I pulled out a long sigh, i got myself to answer.  ” Why now?”  “Why can’t it be now?”, he replied back, too quickly.


“Because when you left, you left without saying goodbye.  You left my heart broken.”

“I can fix this.  I will fix this, promise!”  Those eyes, begging.

Teardrops fell on his cheeks.  He hugged me tight.

Teardrops fell on my cheeks.  I pushed him away.

“I know you can, I know you will.  But I don’t want you to.”   

Then my broken heart bursts completely, shattering into pieces.  Its beyond repair now.  Forever.


This is my very first try. What do you think?  I just altered some major details but this was based from a recent encounter.  Yes, it happened really, till now I cant believe it. Maybe, this is the ending i wanted to have.  Just maybe.






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Quote for the day!


In order to feel it, you have to live it.

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21./22./23. THE MAZE RUNNER TRILOGY by James Dashner

This series of Mr. James Dashner occupied my April.  Our bookclub’s book of the month.  Originally, it was just the pilot book The Maze Runner, but since it was that good and interesting, we eventually continued on reading onto the next book and the next book after that.

We made it the series of the month!

This is how it went, my reactions after reading each stories.

THE MAZE RUNNER by James Dashner


Finished: April 13

ReadPhilippines' book of the month of April. It was fun reading it with buddies. It made the whole reading experience a kind of bit different in a good way. exciting as well. to know somebody is undergoing the same feelings right after you read not the whole book, mind you, but chapter by chapter, kind of appreciate it more. i like the teasing feeling that i give to other readers, esp. @mstessagray, who told me it kinda pushed her to ask for more. 🙂

and this MAZE RUNNER book makes you do that. it makes you crave for more. Action packed as it is, my heart went to Thomas immediately, because we were on the same boat. At the opening of the story, he had no idea what is happening, where is he, and why. He just knew one thing, his name. As same as for me, when i was starting the book. I just knew the title and that somehow its kind of dystopian, hunger games like. And the rest, came after each turn of the pages. The ordeals that these kids had to undergo made my imagination went wild. The running, the grievers, gladers, keepers, the heart pumping stunts that they did. Thomas and Minho, especially. Their actions and decisions, stupid most of the times, but very brave and for the good of everybody. Pages and pages of getting to know this new world of them, and guys, that turning of pages wont stop till i came to the end. End? understatement of the year. Because its not even close to that. I get it. I found out so little details to assume that this whole thing going about the maze is a work of some hideous company of a monster who just like to make kids a form of their entertainment. Bad creators, huh. But there's thing about being WICKED IS GOOD. What is that supposed to mean? At the end, nothing is concrete, it made me ask questions more. What a cliffhanger, right? So, that's the purpose of it being a series, or a trilogy for that more. What am i doing now?? oh well, im jumping to the next book, THE SCORCH TRIALS. The first book was literally maze-involved. The second, you think, is going to be fire-based? 🙂

SCORCH TRIALS  by James Dashner 


Finished:  April 19

SCORCH TRIALS was done a few days back. As ive mentioned in one of the threads , it gave a lasting headache before i actually started the 3rd installment. A lot of confusion and a lot of parties that i no longer knew who to trust, not to mention the new faces. The dark tunnel that they passed after the Flat trans with the silver metal head-eating ball, the wasteland and the lightnings, the Cranks, creepiest of the creepiest hello noses!, travel to the safe haven, running from the griever-like monsters, the Berg, and lots and lots of times that Thomas actually passed out—slept, gun-shot, gas chambered and who knows what other reasons, lives lost except for my most favorite people…im glad they made it! Oh well, that summarizes the 2nd book.


DEATH CURE by James Dashner


Finished:  April 22

DEATH CURE closed its chapter few minutes ago and i had to scramble in this keypad of mine to say this that my head cannot help but to spin even tho i reached the conclusion. Green meadows didn't relax me or my imagination even just a bit. Had a slow start.. actually, most of the time, i wasn't up and running with Thomas unlike the other 2 books that always left me at the edges of my seat and always ready to bolt with them. This time, I just watch Thomas in my head as he went back and forth Wicked's HQ and Denver and Berg, and a lot of escaping and fighting with the Cranks. One scene that broke me down was when he had to say goodbye to one of his friend. He had to say goodbye to a lot in here, but this particular one had me in tears. My heart regained its thumping and fast beating at the last chapters. That was where the real action for me… because i missed the running, i actually enjoyed the last remaining parts. Same feelings i had when the first book was nearing its end also. Up to this minute, i can really say im a die hard of Thomas-Minho friendship club. With all their attitudes and banters, I still want to keep them both! ❤ ❤ ❤

THE KILL ORDER by James Dashner


Finished: April 27

I demand a sequel to this prequel. Ooooh, wait! That will be the maze runner trilogy. Haha! I read and liked and loved the books, maze runner topping the charts.

But, im here to tackle my indifference to the kill order. Don’t get me wrong, i got the story, but i wasn’t able to feel it. Yes, the end of the world is given. With the Flare and the chaos. But in my opinion, too much action was not needed. Already experienced that in the series. The running, escaping, fighting and chasing was old news to me. What i needed was answers, which my humble mind was not able to comprehend after putting the book down. As much as i expected to be cleared from all the confusions hovering in my head, i was still left baffled. What was the real score between the virus-spreading and the need for variables and subjects. Mark and Trina, with Alec and others, but what is the real importance of all those actions when in the end i was given only one valid claim. That is, who will become Deedee…

Prequel is there to pave the way in understanding more but i didn’t quite grasp what Kill Order wanted to convey. MAYBE IT IS JUST ME. A little too much, Kill Order will do even without the cult and insane zombie-likes. It would do just fine with the prologue and the epilogue, which is Thomas. The beginning of the end, the end of the beginning.

Nevertheless, my love for Thomas and The Maze Runner will not falter. Who says everything should please me and be perfect? I did not regret picking it up, I just regret not being enlightened fully. 🙂

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Going healthy!

Yesterday, i met QUINOA and CHIA.

It’s been quite a while that ive been hearing the craze about these…
And its been days that my friend, luv, is bugging me to try them…

Oh, well, hands up! I am ready to meet guys!


QUINOA, pronounced as kinwa, is a grain crop grown primarily for its edible seed.  Source of high protein more than brown rice and potatoes, it has been called a superfood.

7 Health Benefits of quinoa:

1.  high in protein
2.  source of riboflavin
3.  good antiseptic for skin injuries
4.  alkaline-forming
5.  low calorie contents
6.  gluten-free
7.  complex carbohydrate with low glycemic index


CHIA, on the other hand, is a species of flowering plant in the mint family.  Chia seeds are great source of healthy omega-3 fats and fibre.  

10 Healthy Benefits of chia:

1.  combat diabetes
2.  more fibre
3.  stock up on omega-3
4.  stronger teeth and bones
5.  source of manganese
6.  plenty of phosphorus
7.  pack in the protein
8.  fight belly fat
9.  get full.  faster
10. improve heart health

I know,i am not that keen on healthy food and stuffs but since i really want to lose weight, these will be my new companion, from now on. Healthier and skinnier, that’s like hitting two birds in one stone.  Well, make it seeds, two seeds to be exact… quinoa and chia! 🙂

Yesterday, LUV made quinoa more enticing by adding some veggies, broccoli and such.


Mmmmm…. Mine was a happy tummy, indeed! 🙂

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Movie night: SPEED

I just happen to see this showing on cable.  Even how many times i have watched this, it never gets old.  I am crushing all over Keanu Reeves again.  And Sandra Bullock is as fresh as her younger years here.
I really do like their tandem.  They had chemistry.


Watching this feels always the first time.
Crush-o-meter for Keanu… Tilting to 100 and one!  He will always be at the top of my list!



Hey pop-quiz, hotshots!!!

How many years has it been since a bus with a bomb came speeding over the streets and runways of Los Angeles? 
How many years since Officer Jack Traven puts us at the very edge of our seats every time, while doing his expertise in the elevator, the bus, at the train?

20 years! 20 golden years.  And it never gets old.. will never get old for me. JACK TRAVEN is the man of my hour. ❤ ❤ ❤

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20. MAYBE SOMEDAY by Colleen Hoover

What’s that word again? Hoovered?

It happens when one author named  COLLEEN HOOVER  made you read her novel like there was no more tomorrow.  You turned the very first page.  One chapter lead to another and another.  And before u know it, you have reached the remaining last pages of the book, while secretly wishing there’s more to follow.  You devoured it in one sitting, or lying down for that matter.  And after you finally put down the book, flashback and scenes and moments between the characters kept hovering your closed eyes, wishing it did not end so soon.  They should have stayed with you a little bit longer.  Maybe, just maybe, there should be a sequel to this.

That is what being hoovered means.  With MAYBE SOMEDAY, then, Im officially hoovered, once again.

A touching tale of love and forgiveness, letting-gos and second-time-arounds.


If you happen to find out that your bestfriend and roommate is screwing your boyfriend of 2 years, would you be pissed off?  Of course!  That was exactly the sentiments of Sydney. She just underwent a major hearbreak.  She packed her bags and left, but not without leaving her marks on them.  Physically.  She punched them both.  Hunter and Tori.  The boyfriend and the bestfriend.  The pain she caught herself in her hands can’t be compared to the piercing effect to her heart.  Add salt to the wound, the revelation happened exactly the day of her birthday, making her homeless in an instant, soaking wet under the pouring rain.  Broken, defeated.  The two most important people in her life whom she trusted the most were the ones who ripped and torn apart her very heart and soul.

Enter, then this hot knight-in-shining-armour, sweeping Sydney off of the rainy courtyard, offering her shelter for the meantime while she tend and mend her shattered world. He even bought her cake to celebrate despite of the unfortunate event he felt he had a little participation of. That hot guy would be Ridge, Sydney’s next-balcony neighbor.  She’s been noticing him for a good two weeks now, playing his guitar every night across her place.  But they never met officially.  Just at nights, when she sat outside her balcony to listen to his music, sang along with it, while making herself look as if she’s just there making assignments and homeworks, oblivious to his rhythm and blues.

Well, actually that was the starting point of the novel.  As Sydney and Ridge got along each day, connected by music and lyrics they were making beautifully together, they were also unaware of the feelings they were building towards each other.  Yes, that woud have been sweet and okay but for the fact that Ridge has a girlfriend, Maggie.  Maggie is just as lovable and as cute as she can be, so there were no reasons to dislike her relationship with Ridge and go start rooting for Sydney, instead. Actually, in this love triangle, there were no bad guys.  Each has their own back up stories to tell how and why they become as they are in the first place.  As one of the quotes in the book..



So imagine how torn I was while leafing through this.  All sorts of explaining and justifying and reacting.  In the end, i understood.

CoHo really had done a very great job in writing this one.  It is a wonderful masterpiece.  It really reached the depths of my heart and was able to pull me into the world of Sydney and Ridge, words and music.  I felt them.  I cried and ached for each of them.  I was angered, humiliated, hurt.  I felt the regret and the longing, mostly the pain.  The joy and acceptance and patience and happiness i was able to experience through them.  I made words into lyrics with them, I sang with them.

I would not want to go into details for doing it so will give away the real essence of the story.  All i want for you is to find your favorite reading spot, grab a good cup of coffee and turn that very first page of  maybe someday.


And by the way, Ridge can draw all over my body, too, whenever he wants, okay.  Just saying! (laila… I borrowed ur line! hihi)  🙂



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DIVERGENT: Now Showing!

Before it was Katniss and Peeta, now its’s Tris and Four. One of my fave dystopian book-series turned into movie will be out in the cinemas…  sadly i cannot catch its initial screening. Guess, this will have to do!

So tell me now fellow initiates… Are you from Dauntless, Abnegation, Amity, Candor, Erudite?

Or are you something different?  Are you DIVERGENT?!

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17./18./19 CLOCKWORK ANGEL, PRINCE and PRINCESS by Cassandra Clare


As soon as i had began leafing though it, struggled, then finally came to like it, and then it ended.  Never did i tell myself i will like this series as much as i would be allowed to when i started reading it.  You can see it from the reactions i got and wrote on one of the reading forums I was a member of,  after reading each book.  First,  the CLOCKWORK ANGEL, i wasn’t drawn into it, cannot find the connection between me and the world i was supposed to be seeing with Tessa and Will.  I didnt even buy the love story.  All that held me into it was the familiar words like shadowhunters, the institute which now is set in London, clave, lightwood, idris, downworlders, church.  Thanks to Mortal Instruments series, that i really love!  As i can recall, there was a bit of disappointment and a lot of browsing and scanning and jumping pages after pages and a little of encouragement to make it through the second book.

But i did continue reading the CLOCKWORK PRINCE.  Because a fellow reader told me to give it a chance, she said the finale book was worth it.  To think i was just not even halfway there.  But you know what, im glad i did.  This was how i had shown my gladness in writing, after finishing the second of the trilogy.

“im glad, i continued.  Indeed, clockwork angel was not love at first sight for me.  Tessa was still not as effective as a heroine was supposed to be since the first book, always the damsel in distress, always trying to be courageous but ending up to be rescued in the end.  But that was okay.  That hole was filled by the character of Will Herondale here.  Truly, i didn’t pay any notice to him but the revelations made me understand him.  It made me ache for him, made me favor him over Jem, whose calmness was just as boring to me.  You could tell that i totally disagree with how decisions were made at the end when it comes to the love triangle.  But that was exactly the situation calls for. A boy treated like a glass, they were scared to break him by the truth, and a boy who now finds the light but was diffused fast, and then a girl who was totally confused, cannot distinguish really what love is for her.

A lot of truths coming out in this series, some deaths, some crossing the border, some disappointment, some love.  

im glad i continued, did i already say that? :)”

As i remember reading the first few chapters of the CLOCKWORK PRINCE, a smile kept on appearing on my face.  Why? Because im starting to believe Laila, the fellow reader who told me to give all of them a chance.  She was down right on insisting.  The revelations in the second book made me understand the characters more.   The villains will always be there to put conflicts and obstacles on the way, but the progression and improvements on every character was obviously laid in the book.  Till the time came for them to really face the harsh reality of the situations they were all in, the story was on a roll already.

The finale book, CLOCKWORK PRINCESS was a lot for me to take.  In a good way, if i may say so.  The actions, the twists, the problem solving, desperations and losses, the comedic antics, the drama, the rollercoaster rides of feeling and emotions, TESSA, WILL, JEM.  I felt them all.  The battles, all of the battles with the automatons that i watched through reading almost always gave me the creeps. Because i saw how they evolved.   From simple mechanism they had started, with mute and awkward actions, just pure metal, till they learn how to answer to the master they were trained to answer for to the filling of skin and other body parts,  till they learn how to use minds of their own through the demon energies they were given mixed with the hatred and vengeance they want for nephilims.  They were plain scary.  I cannot imagine how to outrun them, even if am a shadowhunter myself. Thus, now i know, where the title name fits, clockwork, as for machine.

For the part that was bugging me ever since the love triangle was clearly stated, and Magnus Bane uttered these words to Tessa, “Most people are lucky to have even one great love in their life.  You have found two.”  I came to understand the true meaning of that when i reached the remaining last pages of the book.  True to the words, Tessa found two great loves.  She has to choose, yes, but she did it wisely and wholeheartedly.  To know how she was able to do that, you must read the series yourself. 🙂

It felt like the last book was two-parts in itself, the real cause of the problem, and the resolution for problem.  The beginning and the end.  All the events happened was also to be noted significant.  Even the simple exchanges of missives between the Consul, and Charlotte or Gabriel and Gideon, the fight with the worm at Chiswick, the solo journey of Will searching for Tessa, the battling against sickness of Jem, Charlotte’s own cries to fight for the Institute.  Henry’s inventions, Magnus” expertise, love tangles between Gabriel, Cecily, Gideon and Sophie, the eerie silence of the Silent Brothers despite the boldness and melancholic choice of music of Bridget, the not-so-participation of the Clave.  They were all important.

But some much important scenes had stayed with me.  The farewell conversation of  Jem and Will.  All those sweet and brave and shocking moments of Tessa and Jem and Will.  The emotional times  of Tessa and Will, most especially the moments  when Tessa was just recalling the lifetime of love and happiness she made with Will.  Having a glimpse of the not so past of their future together (gets?!) was just an unexplainable feeling.  Oh how i wept for them.  I really cried, but with a happy note to end, at that.

CASSANDRA CLARE, i just thought, made the unthinkable again.  How i came to love the mortal instruments instantly, gave meaning on how i can put my heart into the infernal devices, if i just gave the chance and time to it.  Slowly but surely, i will crave for more.  The trilogy was one smooth ride for me, despite all the bumps and rough phases on the way.  But that made it more interesting for me, and came to make me love this series.  I am glad i experienced the shadowhunters’ world once again.  A complete package for me, an epic ending.

— courtesy of YOUTUBE

This give me the chills, as i remember reading Book One.  It felt gooood to reminisce when Cassandra Clare was just introducing me to Tessa Gray, Will Herondale and Jem Carstairs.  It never occured to me that i will learn to like these three.  Now, as ive finished reading the books, i am kind of missing them all.

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